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Featured this Month:

From the Desk of Father Rubey
Monday, December 01, 2014 by Father Rubey
As we enter December and we prepare to celebrate Christmas and the celebration of Lights and Hanukkah we are reminded that this is a time to exchange gifts with those people who are important to us and we want to exchange gifts as a reminder that these people deserve something special because of who they are and that we want to express our gratitude to them for being so nice to us and making us feel very special. It is a time when we draw up our own “wish list” of things that we want during this season of gift giving.

One of the wishes that I have on my list is a wish that there would be a better understanding and appreciation of those people who suffer from depression or some other form of mental illness. Not many people understand that people who suffer from depression have beautiful and creative souls that have been clouded by the ravages of depression. This does not make them into someone who should be subjected to misunderstanding and avoidance. Rather they are people who need our attention and affection. We don’t know or appreciate the darkness that engulfs their souls and makes them suffer in silence because no one understands them or allows them to be themselves. Such people are relegated to be imprisoned with their illness because people don’t understand the depth of their desperation and pain.

There is a lot of attention afforded to people who suffer from other types of physical illnesses such as breast cancer or diabetes. Many people go on walks to raise money for more research into these and other illnesses. In the past several years there have been Out of Darkness walks to raise money for suicide prevention but it would be nice if there were walks for people who suffer from depression and raise funds to assist these people before they get to the point of taking their lives. “Depression kills” was a memorial square that someone made to memorialize a mother who had taken her life. That square sticks out in my mind because it is a stark reminder that depression can be and often is a fatal illness. If only there were a greater understanding and acceptance of this illness maybe there would be a decrease in the numbers of suicides in our society.

Depressed people are capable of putting on a great act in a crowd. They can fake it for an evening and then go home and take off the mask and let reality set in and feel the ravages of their illness. They suffer in silence because of a lack of understanding. Oftentimes people who lack understanding and are ignorant about depression will suggest to a depressed person to just “snap out of it.” The more education that is provided for society about depression the more people who suffer from depression will be inclined to come forward and express how they are truly feeling and take off the mask and quit acting like everything is fine. It is possible that some lives can be saved if only there were more education and understanding about how serious an illness depression is.

People who suffer from depression are very often also very lonely. They don’t like to be around people because they get tired of putting on an act. They would like to be themselves and have other people accept them for who they are and learn to be comfortable with their illness. Because we live in a society that appears to be always in an upbeat mood depressed people feel like they don’t really fit in anywhere because they are not always upbeat. They can’t be themselves and they can’t be truthful about their real feelings. It must be awful to feel so out of place and be so lonely even when they are in a crowd with all types of people who are laughing and having a good time. Depressed people want to crawl in a hole and disappear and not have to see people who are in such upbeat moods. Inside, these depressed people feel very lonely because no one understands them or has a clue how they feel inside. They are truly broken spirits. They literally want to die because of a lack of understanding of how they are feeling.

Depressed people feel so misunderstood. It would be nice if people did understand their feelings of loneliness and how inadequate such people feel. It would be nice if some people really believed them and took them at their word. It would be nice if people accepted them as they really are instead of as the way they should be or the way that society wants them to be but as they are. It is very tiring to be depressed and misunderstood and lonely all at the same time.

One suggestion is to allow someone who is depressed to truly express themselves and their feelings and let them know that they can be honest and open about expressing how they truly are. Depressed people get tired of putting on an act. They want to take the mask off and share the depths of their souls to someone who wants to listen to them without judging or without offering solutions to the problem. Depressed people want to be accepted as they are and not as society wants them to be.

Very often, survivors of a completed suicide beat themselves up in the immediate aftermath of the suicide of a loved one. This is a very normal reaction. Survivors feel that they missed something and some sign that their loved one was giving off. That is not the case. These loved ones never came forward to honestly express their feelings. For some reason they did not express their true feelings. If they didexpress that they wanted to die and in fact plan on taking their lives family and friends would have rallied around them and got them to a safe place for help. These hurting souls were either confused or ashamed to share their true feelings. Survivors of a completed suicide did not miss a thing. They were never adequately informed. That is one of the issues that survivors are asked to work on in the immediate aftermath of losing a loved one from suicide.

That is my Christmas wish list. I hope that it is not too much to ask for. The more we can educate people in society about the ravages of mental illness and depression the better off we will be. Mental illness is an illness like any other illness and it needs to be explored and explained so that society has a deeper understanding and appreciation for those people who are so affected by the illness. These are not bad people or people who need to be avoided. They are creatures of the same God who made all of us and need to be respected and loved and accepted as we all want to be.

As we gather with family and friends during these holidays I want to assure each and every member of the LOSS family of my thoughts and prayers and I encourage you to do the same for the LOSS family –especially for those who have recently joined our family.

Keep On Keepin’ On


Archives:

From the Desk of Father Rubey
Monday, December 01, 2014 by Father Rubey
As we enter December and we prepare to celebrate Christmas and the celebration of Lights and Hanukkah we are reminded that this is a time to exchange gifts with those people who are important to us and we want to exchange gifts as a reminder that these people deserve something special because of who they are and that we want to express our gratitude to them for being so nice to us and making us feel very special. It is a time when we draw up our own “wish list” of things that we want during this season of gift giving.

One of the wishes that I have on my list is a wish that there would be a better understanding and appreciation of those people who suffer from depression or some other form of mental illness. Not many people understand that people who suffer from depression have beautiful and creative souls that have been clouded by the ravages of depression. This does not make them into someone who should be subjected to misunderstanding and avoidance. Rather they are people who need our attention and affection. We don’t know or appreciate the darkness that engulfs their souls and makes them suffer in silence because no one understands them or allows them to be themselves. Such people are relegated to be imprisoned with their illness because people don’t understand the depth of their desperation and pain.

There is a lot of attention afforded to people who suffer from other types of physical illnesses such as breast cancer or diabetes. Many people go on walks to raise money for more research into these and other illnesses. In the past several years there have been Out of Darkness walks to raise money for suicide prevention but it would be nice if there were walks for people who suffer from depression and raise funds to assist these people before they get to the point of taking their lives. “Depression kills” was a memorial square that someone made to memorialize a mother who had taken her life. That square sticks out in my mind because it is a stark reminder that depression can be and often is a fatal illness. If only there were a greater understanding and acceptance of this illness maybe there would be a decrease in the numbers of suicides in our society.

Depressed people are capable of putting on a great act in a crowd. They can fake it for an evening and then go home and take off the mask and let reality set in and feel the ravages of their illness. They suffer in silence because of a lack of understanding. Oftentimes people who lack understanding and are ignorant about depression will suggest to a depressed person to just “snap out of it.” The more education that is provided for society about depression the more people who suffer from depression will be inclined to come forward and express how they are truly feeling and take off the mask and quit acting like everything is fine. It is possible that some lives can be saved if only there were more education and understanding about how serious an illness depression is.

People who suffer from depression are very often also very lonely. They don’t like to be around people because they get tired of putting on an act. They would like to be themselves and have other people accept them for who they are and learn to be comfortable with their illness. Because we live in a society that appears to be always in an upbeat mood depressed people feel like they don’t really fit in anywhere because they are not always upbeat. They can’t be themselves and they can’t be truthful about their real feelings. It must be awful to feel so out of place and be so lonely even when they are in a crowd with all types of people who are laughing and having a good time. Depressed people want to crawl in a hole and disappear and not have to see people who are in such upbeat moods. Inside, these depressed people feel very lonely because no one understands them or has a clue how they feel inside. They are truly broken spirits. They literally want to die because of a lack of understanding of how they are feeling.

Depressed people feel so misunderstood. It would be nice if people did understand their feelings of loneliness and how inadequate such people feel. It would be nice if some people really believed them and took them at their word. It would be nice if people accepted them as they really are instead of as the way they should be or the way that society wants them to be but as they are. It is very tiring to be depressed and misunderstood and lonely all at the same time.

One suggestion is to allow someone who is depressed to truly express themselves and their feelings and let them know that they can be honest and open about expressing how they truly are. Depressed people get tired of putting on an act. They want to take the mask off and share the depths of their souls to someone who wants to listen to them without judging or without offering solutions to the problem. Depressed people want to be accepted as they are and not as society wants them to be.

Very often, survivors of a completed suicide beat themselves up in the immediate aftermath of the suicide of a loved one. This is a very normal reaction. Survivors feel that they missed something and some sign that their loved one was giving off. That is not the case. These loved ones never came forward to honestly express their feelings. For some reason they did not express their true feelings. If they didexpress that they wanted to die and in fact plan on taking their lives family and friends would have rallied around them and got them to a safe place for help. These hurting souls were either confused or ashamed to share their true feelings. Survivors of a completed suicide did not miss a thing. They were never adequately informed. That is one of the issues that survivors are asked to work on in the immediate aftermath of losing a loved one from suicide.

That is my Christmas wish list. I hope that it is not too much to ask for. The more we can educate people in society about the ravages of mental illness and depression the better off we will be. Mental illness is an illness like any other illness and it needs to be explored and explained so that society has a deeper understanding and appreciation for those people who are so affected by the illness. These are not bad people or people who need to be avoided. They are creatures of the same God who made all of us and need to be respected and loved and accepted as we all want to be.

As we gather with family and friends during these holidays I want to assure each and every member of the LOSS family of my thoughts and prayers and I encourage you to do the same for the LOSS family –especially for those who have recently joined our family.

Keep On Keepin’ On