Chicago’s Skid Row was once a stretch of Chicago’s Madison Avenue that ran from the near west side of the Loop past the old Chicago Stadium.

It’s a place Fr. Charles Rubey remembers very vividly.

“These men on Skid Row wanted to get off the street,” recalls Fr. Rubey of his Catholic Charities work starting in 1972, “…and for more than three years I worked with them as they tried to straighten their lives out.”

While Fr. Rubey recently marked his 50 years with Catholic Charities and 56 years since his ordination as a priest, he stays focused on his work to offer mercy and hope to the families he continues to counsel. Skid Row may no longer exist, yet Catholic Charities responds daily to thousands of people in need including counseling survivors of suicide.

Today, Fr. Rubey is the founding leader of the LOSS program, shortened from Loving Outreach to Survivors of Suicide, one of the longest running counseling programs at Catholic Charities and a program he started in 1979 after obtaining an advanced degree in social work.

“Three couples who had formed a bond due to the loss of a child to suicide had formed an organization called Compassionate Friends,” recalled Fr. Rubey. “They approached Catholic Charities to see what could be done on a broader level for people experiencing this loss. Through our combined efforts, the LOSS program was born.”

Over time, the program discovered more families reeling in the wake of a suicide, prompting the program’s expansion to other parts of the Catholic Charities region. Today, LOSS has three staff members, seven part-time therapists, and 40 volunteers, and coordinates virtual counseling sessions to families across the United States. It has been recognized by the United Nations as a model self-help program and hosted trainings for the World Health Organization among other agencies.

The need for LOSS remains strong. The National Center for Suicide Prevention estimates that 132 people die each day in the US from suicide.

“Anybody on our side will tell you suicide is different,” said Katy, a former LOSS participant. “You need someone to guide you, to tell you you’re not crazy, and just let you go through the process. The support Fr. Rubey provided us was extraordinary.”

At the annual Blossoms of Hope Brunch, the Fr. Charles T. Rubey Award is given to an individual or group who exemplifies the meaning of loving outreach as Fr. Rubey has done for so many years. The brunch returns this year as an in-person event at the Drury Lane Oak Brook. At the 2022 virtual event, former White House Senior Advisor David Axelrod received the distinction and delivered a great message of hope as a survivor of suicide after the loss of his father many years ago.

Former Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel presented Fr. Rubey with a resolution in 2019 recognizing his contributions to the mental health field and to the thousands of people who have participated in LOSS since its inception.

Fr. Rubey continues his ministry to the bereaved, celebrating Mass, blessing locations where loved ones have died, and sharing hope through his work each day. Survivors who practice other faith traditions or no faith tradition are equally welcomed and supported at LOSS.

“People often ask me the great question of why their loved one took their own life,” shared Fr. Rubey. “That is all about the mystery of God. The path to resolution is that survivors are challenged to live with mystery.”

“I have learned that grief from suicide is a very lengthy process and talking about the trauma takes a long time. Our individual and group sessions meet survivors where they are and guide them in the process. Because of the pandemic, we suspended in-person meetings and began meeting virtually. One of the positive results of these virtual meetings is that we were able to reach people all over the country who might not have the support in their local communities.”

After all this time, Fr. Rubey’s spirit is resilient even in the midst of accompanying families through unimaginable grief.

“My 50 years at Catholic Charities have been a great experience for me as a priest,” reflected Fr. Rubey. “I have had the privilege of witnessing people come to grips with losing a loved one to suicide and recreate their lives to experience joy and happiness again. It can be done.”